The Goblet Of Fire

If you are between 6 and 11 this was the most anticipated event of the year, naturally - and as I'm lucky enough to witness and share in the excitement of one particular nine year old I find it difficult to see the cynicism most childless adults have to this iconic series. Being in a full cinema on a Saturday morning and feeling the air buzz with nervous energy and hope for a movie is something very special whatever the actual film in question. Those I know above the age of 13 that have allowed themselves to enjoy the books say that Goblet of Fire is their favourite - It is deeper, darker, more grown up and 3 times as long as the preceding 3, and as such must have caused the execs a fair few headaches in pre-production. It was always going to have to be one film albeit a much condensed version of the book, purely for marketing reasons, and even at a popcorn stretching 2hrs and 40 minutes is way too short to represent its print version with any accuracy. And herein lie all its problems; those who have not read the book will become confused to the point of not caring as key events are skimmed over in 20 seconds, if at all, and very little is explained enough to give the climax its necessary gravity. Not that what is in there is bad, it does have a different atmosphere about it, brought in by the new director, but most scenes are handled very well, especially the last half hour and the re-emergence of Lord Voldemort (a deliciously creepy Ralph Fiennes stealing the show), but there is so much missing the whole falls way short of the sense of doom that should be present as the credits roll. Also I have to mention the main trio of teenagers... As younger actors it was easier to forgive their inexperience and lack of emotional depth, but they have done 4 of these things now and things really are not improving; now they are just beginning to look stupid surrounded as they are by the cream of British talent. Indeed the grown ups were outstanding as ever in their roles, but Rickman and the rest were shamefully underused, with Brendan Gleeson as the new dark arts teacher Mad Eye Moody the only one allowed the scope to camp it up in style - he is hilarious, a great character that saves the tone from entering the realm of the mediocre more than once. What this needs is a longer directors cut to fill it out, I don't know if such a thing exists, but if not I may even have to think twice about buying the DVD and seeing it again... Who am I kidding? My daughter is nine! Of course we'll buy it - it's the law. 7/10 Kx

Jonathan Strange

A quick look back over the last year of The Wasteland archives reveals the embarrassing fact that I've only managed to get through 3 books from cover to cover in a twelve month period - and one of those I read twice! This has to be an all time low in my adult life and something I definitely need to address. Of course technology is largely to blame in various forms, so it is nice that the book that had the power to grab my attention contains nothing more modern than 1818 and is over a thousand pages long!! It concerns two magicians who live in an early 19th century England that presupposes a rich and very real history of magic alongside the facts and events we are familiar with. One (Mr Norrell) is a fusty bookworm, very conservative and twitchy in nature, whose aim is to revive the great tradition of English magic with himself and his beloved library as its exclusive centre, and the other is a young and immensely talented upstart, who begins as the others' apprentice only to blossom into something much wilder and unpredictable, whose goal is to restore to power the legendary Raven King of old Newcastle. Susanna Clarke, in this remarkable debut, binds non fussy and rooted narrative with such outrageous fancies that we have no problem accepting that the Napoleonic wars were influenced by spells and fairies. Wellington, Byron and the mad king George III provide a backbone of real persons around which the protagonists together with a wealth of other vividly drawn characters weave a strange tale indeed - of rivalry, prophecy, loss, love, ambition and destiny. It is this range of characters that make it such a compelling read - Vinculus the filthy street conjurer; Childermass, Norrell's shady "man of business" (and my personal favourite); Stephen Black, the enchanted servant destined to be king; the elusive Raven King himself, John Uskglass; and, above all, the mischievous fairy known only as "The Gentleman with thistledown hair"... each is so different and so alive that it is a genuine thrill to follow them to the book's hugely satisfying conclusion. As a debut, you begin by wondering if the interesting premise will hold water for such a length as a thousand pages, especially as the early chapters meander in a quite pedestrian way through so many subjects it is impossible to see them becoming collectively relevant, but by the arrival of Strange in the second section of three they do; in fact becoming such indispensable details that you chide yourself for being so narrow-sighted. The second thing that happens is you begin projecting possible outcomes and start to wish for certain things to come about, which, again, they eventually do, only not perhaps in the way you imagined...! By the last 3rd I was in love with this book and continued to have my expectations of it surpassed by its ingenious devices, messages and pure imagination. It exists now for me in the same league as other great fantasy tomes I have read and adored - The Lord of The Rings, Gormenghast and the His Dark Materials trilogy. It really is that good and 50 years from now will surely be revered as a classic of the early 21st century - I urge everyone to find the time to drift off into its world and allow yourself to be carried away. I believe the rights for the film are already sold (I, for one, will be submitting my C.V.), but try to read it before the images of that cloud your experience of it - I can never now think of Tolkien's classic without seeing Viggo Mortensen et al, and as much as I love the movies it is the written word and that long slow pleasure of reading that gives it its true magic. 10/10 Kx

Goldfrapp

Of the latest batch of albums out there this Autumn there is not a lot that has taken my fancy - the pre-Christmas market seems to get flooded with the bland and the repetitive and you have to fish a little for something original. Well, I'm not sure this album can be classified as original, as at times it has deliciously reminded me of Abba, Kate Bush, Gary Newman, OMD, T-Rex and even a bit of Kylie! What are you doing? - I hear you cry - That sounds bloody awful! Perhaps if this had come to me in a different mood I would be agreeing with you, but I put it on in reverence to the one or two tracks I liked from their debut album Felt Mountain and found something almost entirely different but immediately likeable - and it lasted the whole album with no breaks! What we have here then is a collection of superbly crafted pop songs designed to help you get your funk on in style! And for some reason I couldn't be more delighted... All the pretension of earlier works has been swept away and you'd be hard pressed to find anything too deep here, but aurally, as long as you're partial to a little electronica, like me, then you're in for a treat. They seem to have found the trick of great pop hooks and catchy choruses and layered them with their distictively European blend of future and retro to create a sensational whole. My favourite track keeps changing between several excellent candidates and I find myself playing the entire album through almost once a day. There may very well come a day when I can't stand the thought of it but for now I just Love it - ooh la la... 9/10 Kx

Nanny McPhee

The plan for bonfire night - a strangely unique British holiday, celebrating someone trying to blow something up and failing - was to get down to Meadowbank stadium and enjoy the pyrotechnics in the chill November air; an event which has become an annual treat. But we failed to realise that it was the 400th anniversary of Guy Faulks' plot and the extra celebrations planned had inspired everyone and their dogs to snap up all the tickets in advance! There was nothing for it but to check the cinema listings for something suitably PG, and that turned out to be the Emma Thompson scripted Nanny McPhee. The idea didn't exactly fill me with excitement, but the revelation of an undiscovered cinema in Edinburgh did. The Dominion in Morningside has been here much longer than I have yet somehow it had managed to hide beneath the shadow of the multiplexes till now. It's big appeal is that it has managed to maintain its independence with a touch of class, to say the least - a beautiful bar with regency trimmings, ushers in proper waiscoats and leather sofas and footstools in every screen! Making it more like a posh theatre than a cinema, a real flashback to how it used to be. What luxury to be able to take your shoes off and lay back while watching on the big screen - by the end I had all but forgotten there were other people there, so much was it like my own livingroom. Brilliant! As for the film: not bad at all - sickly sweet and very predictable, but it is aimed at very young ones. It does have a touch of class wrapped up in an entirely British sensibility that draws obvious comparisons to Mary Poppins. There is a lot of magic in there and only time will tell if it can come close to the status that film enjoys. Personally I could have done without the talking donkey, but I am 32... 7.5/10 Kx

Saw

And to finish off a day of movies no Halloween would be complete without a proper shocker at home with all the lights off. Adverts for Saw II were everywhere, so I looked back on reviews of the first movie, which had passed me by, to see if it was worth a look. To my surprise the reviews were indeed very good and I wondered why it had slipped my radar first time around. It all begins very ominously with two men chained to opposite ends of a dark and disgusting bathroom with a dead man face down in a pool of blood in the middle. Slowly they realise they are part of a game being played by an inventive serial killer who wants his victims to appreciate the value of their lives which they have somehow taken for granted. It is effective enough in some scenes, certainly very creepy, and were it not for the plethora of cliches and some terribly camp acting this would have been much closer to its obvious model, Seven. There are jumps, twists and gore aplenty, loosely hung on a pretty good premise that doesn't quite live up to the potential it suggests. The main question asked is would you lop off your own leg with a hacksaw if it meant you could live? Tough one! Cary Elwes is so overthetop towards the end that you get the requisite horror laughs too, something that Danny Glover's obsessed cop also contributes to. It is an instantly disposable and enjoyable film which for the genre actually achieves a lot more than the average fare, but is by no means a good movie. Perfect for the evening but not one for the collection. 6.5/10 K.